Alzheimer is the warden, my great grand-pop was the the inmate. Time dissolved his memory. During my youth we were close, but the disease stole him from me. Once family, now a familiar stranger. His mind changed everything. No longer in cohesion with it, but war. Unable to retrieve his intimate memories. But constantly transitioning from the past to reality. I wanted him to witness the women that I have become. To see the proud look upon his face, followed by his charming smile. Although he is gone, my memories of him remain alive. I love you pop pop.
I managed to make yet another mess of my life. My youth is ignorant, and rebels from wisdom. I am well aware of right, and wrong, but in my youth I am an egoist. I sinned against my faith, but too far gone to care. When the fun fades, there I am, alone, empty. I was full when I left, but the distractions of life ate away at me. Constant compromise is the consequence for this broken me. I want to return to the place of great joy, but I feel undeserving to ask for such a request. Each day without Him, I barely exist. I try to return to the place I once was, but I see pitch black. I am neither claimed by heaven or hell. I must choose a side my lukewarm heart is indecisive. I am alone in my room, and the exposure scares me. With the help of conviction and humility my confessions are free. My repentance accepted, and unexpected tears rain down my face. Condemnation I feel no longer, but familiar characteristics of who I once was. My identity now claims me, and my past is a stranger. I am home again, and forever I will remain.
Identity in Progress... 